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Teshuva and Understanding Your Mission in Life
It's a mistake to get angry. If you've actually attained the Yirat Shamayim that you were supposed to, you would have known that this (what's causing you to be angry) came from heaven.
It came from HaShem. This loss came from HaShem. It didn't come from the guy you're angry at. The guy was just used as a little soldier to create the loss. It could have been any other way. HaShem wanted you to lose money; HE Chose him. Why? Because that guy wanted to do something bad. He wanted to do something evil. As a result, you want to do something evil, he deserves something bad. Okay let's make a match, a shidduch.
Everything Comes from HaShem
If you were a bit humble you would realize that everything and anything that happens in the world is from HaShem. He's overseeing everything, nothing is a happenstance, nothing is a coincidence, and nothing is luck.
To say:
if I would have done this, this would have happened;
if I would have done that, this would have happened;
if I would have gotten early, it wouldn't have happened;
if it would have sold early, if it would have sold late...if this, if that;
That's Kefira. It's 100 percent heresy.
To say, if I would have done this, then such-and-such would have happened – that's actually kefira. It's forbidden in the Torah to say: "if I would have done something". What happened was exactly what was supposed to happen. Could you have done things differently? Yes, but you didn't.
All of those calculations that people have in their heads leads them to be away from HaShem, not closer to HaShem. Because, in essence what they're saying is that they believe the power is in their hands. The power to profit is in their hands. This is Kefira, because HaKodesh Baruch Hu already decided how much parnasa you're going to make in the beginning of the year. So whether you would have called this customer or not, whether you would have been in this business or not, or whether you would have stated a different business or not, all of those things are simply irrelevant. HaKadosh Baruch simply decided you're going to get X amount of money with our without this job. You're going to get an X amount of money with or without this tool. With our without this news.
You're gonna make, you're gonna lose...whatever it is, HaShem already decided what it is. Whether you believe a lot or believe a little, you should always know regardless of what you do, the parnasa is coming from HaShem. Just like the knowledge of the Torah is coming from HaShem The parnasa is also coming fro HaShem – everything comes from HaShem.
Toil in Torah. You Control Your Effort.
The problem with our logic, our Yetzer Hara, is that we're constantly trying to give ourselves the credit for our own actions. And what ends up happening is that you think you're the one doing it. You think that you're the one that's making the money. You think that you're the one that's in control of your own success.
The chachamim explain that a person like that is going to lose his life, feeling like he's been cheated, feeling like he's never got enough. Why? Because no one ever thinks that the world is viewing them the way they should.
Everybody thinks they're smarter than what they really are.
Everybody thinks that they're nicer than what they really are.
Everybody thinks that they're more good than they really are.
It's just a reality.
Everybody thinks better of themselves unless they have a lot of Torah, because then they're humble. But the average person thinks much better of themselves than what they really are. So if that person is proud , they're never going to think that they get enough respect. This is someone who has lack of Emunah that HaKodesh Baruch Hu is running his life. HaShem is the only one that's responsible for the outcome of everything. Such a person is going to live a very bitter life.
When a person is not humble, when a person is constantly looking for more, they'll never be happy with whatever they have. You see people left and right taking drugs, all types of mental drugs to numb their pain, to numb their depression, to get them out of reality. In reality, you don't need any of this stuff.
All you need is to follow the instruction of the sages. But that requires toil.
The actual outcome of whatever happens in the world is not our problem. It's not up to us.
HaShem decides whether we succeed.
HaShem decides whether we fail.
We simply decide whether we're going to try or not.
We decide whether to show up or not.
That's what we decide.
We decide whether we're going to open the Gemara and learn it.
We decide whether we're going to open the Sidder and pray.
We decide whether we're going to follow the halacha, or not follow the halacha.
Everything is from heaven except the fear of heaven.
(Berachot 33b)
Meaning, the outcome of everything is from heaven. Whether you follow what heaven dictated for you or not – that's in your hands. What do you think is going to happen when the Beit MaMikdash is built? What do you think is going to happen when the MaShiach is going to come?
Two Thoughts You Should have To Achieve a Desired Outcome
1) First ask yourself: how could I serve HaKadosh Baruch Hu at my best potential now under the current circumstances? How can I be the best tool for HaKadosh Baruch Hu under the current difficult conditions to the point of realizing that this difficulty is to my interest?
2) Then ask yourself: what else can I do to merit the circumstances changing?
So first thing we need to do is the work on ourselves, see what we're missing. If Baruch HaShem we're doing well with that, if we're constantly doing teshuva, then there's another possibility. Did we pray for it enough? Not that we prayed for it. Surely you prayed for it. But did we pray for it enough?
What's enough? Enough is when it's accepted.
HaShem Controls the Outcome
Moshe Rabbeinu prayed 515 times to get to Eretz Israel until HaShem said enough. Meaning, there has to be a point where HaShem pretty much says either no or yes. But also, always remember your responsibility is the effort. HaShem's responsibility is the outcome.
Pray every day, do whatever you can to improve yourself every day, and you still find the way to serve HaKodosh Baruch Hu to the ultimate potential under the current conditions even if they don't change. Meaning, you're happy with the circumstances with our without any changes. Then you know that when it happened, HaShem did it. If it didn't happen, HaShem did it.
What are you going to be upset about?
If it didn't work out, that means HaShem didn't want it.
I did my best. It didn't work out, Baruch HaShem, HaShem listened to my prayers. At least once I know i did my best, there's nothing for me to be sad about. And everything if you see it play out, you're always going to see how HaShem is good. HaShem is merciful, the ultimate kind of kindness comes from Him.
The problem with us is that we're always part of the equation but pretend like we know the whole thing.
The greatest disaster that could literally happen to a human being while still alive can turn him into something holy. HaKadosh Baruch Hu gave the tools to deal with that test. Nonetheless, you see HaKadosh Baruch Us gave a tikkun, a major
major tragedy but he also gave you the tools to deal with them.
Needless to say, our little problems, whatever they are, are nothing in comparison to such a thing. Of course, HaShem gave us also the tools. All you gotta do is stop for a second, turn off the phone, and focus on HaKadosh Baruch Hu.
You'll not only attain a good level, a good mind to pray, but that mind will help you get what you want. And ultimately, you'll have that contentment that will get you the ultimate level of happiness in this world.
BeEzrat HaShem this will help us get closer to HaKadosh Baruch Hu, bring the MaShiach closer, and bring ourselves closer to where we're supposed to be.
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